superman always has amnesia in fics. i want batman to have amnesia. and clark has to justifiably explain why he needs to be by brucieās side. like, bruce naturally assumes heās is his metropolis boyfriend and clark is not fast enough to come up with a believable lie before the batkids are like YES, THIS IS YOUR BOYFRIEND CLARK, HE WEARS KHAKIS AND TERRIBLE TIES BUT YOU LOVE HIMĀ
clark splits time being superman and batman (because nightwing canāt fill in) and oh god, bruce has a crisis because he has a crush on batman
clark has to sneak all his plaid shirts into the manor. like, bruce feels bad about not remembering his hot farm boy reporter so he doesnāt criticize all the plaid but really wants to say something
like really wants to
and bruce canāt sleep at night, like he was up all night wandering around the manor and like he almost discovered the bat cave while playing the pianoĀ
wayne corp cant deal with how hands on bruce is being with the company, like he is awake during board meetings. everyone is freaking out.Ā
clarkās parents. are. so. supportive?
omg, our son in law is in crisis, letās move in and take care of him.
clark is not amused.
Bruce has a long heartfelt conversation with Clark about his Batcrush and Clark is just like being supportive externally but internally he has no fucking idea what to do.
give clark kent more secret identities challenge 2k19
Broke: Clark Kentās secret identity as a spy gets him dragged into a big spy crossover.
Woke: Clark Kentās secret identity as Batman gets him dragged into a love triangle with Bruce Wayne and himself, while Lois laughs her ass off.
the myth that batman is invulnerable has peaked, criminal underworld claims batman can catch a grenade and crush it with his fistĀ
bruce wayne worried his supportive plaid wearing boyfriend wont like batman
Amazing
Whereās the fic?
@ambrosius-faust Eliiiiiiiii~~~~ pls write something for this I am begging you
I need this fic like I need air
Dick, Tim and Jason, to Clark at different occasions:Ā āI can be your Robin!ā :O
Bruce, surprised with Lucius being surprised at his constant attendance in the WE, does a bit of research on his pre-amnesia persona and is DISMAYED to discover that he used to be such an uncaring airhead and wows to change that, starting now! How could he demand of Tim - A BABY! - to full in for him while he cruised with the models???!Ā
Lucius tearing at his hair because how you keep Bruce Wayne away from his own R&D???
The family dismayed that now Bruce is on a warpath of being a Good Dad and they have no peace to do their jobs, because Be wants to sped time with them and they have to pretend thereās no shady stuff happening!
And Jason! Bruce is perplexed by Jason! Isnāt he supposed to be dead? All the papers said so and his death certificate is readā¦ what?!Ā
Jason:Ā āYeah! I had to pretend to die and then went undercover! Now Iām aā¦I- I work for the FBI!ā
Bruce:Ā āOhā¦ Iām so proud of you, Jay!āĀ
Jason: *in a strangled voice* T-Thanks, Bā¦
Oh my god, whump! š
bruce not understanding any of selinaās innuendo, like he really thinks she is into cats. and selina is perplexed when all bruce asks to see her cat photos and he talks about how much he loves his boyfriend.Ā
Bruce taking the time to reassure Jason that heās proud of him, that he loves him because he was fifteenĀ when he went into witness protection. Of course, Bruce looks up all the newspapers in the months after Jasonās death and sees all pictures of him after the funeral, looking like death warmed over- clearly in mourning-Ā so he thinks that he didnāt know that Jason was alive because thingsĀ and considering the lack of presence in the mansion, this is a pretty believable theory.
So Bruce always takes the time to reassure Jason that just because his memories are gone and they obviously were in the middle of a fight or something, heās still his son, heās glad heās alive and this isnāt going to change when he gets his memories back
Jason: *visibly trying not to burst into tears and cry on his dadās shoulder because part of him is still a fifteen year old who just wants his dad to be proud of him and say,Ā āI love you,āĀ out loud*
Alfred: *entirely pleased because Jason is now spending more time at the mansion and Bruce is displaying never before seen levels of emotional intelligence*
OH.
Damian.
Poor Damian with his mother and excuse for a childhood, oh my Lordy,Ā how does one go about explaining Damianās behavior to civilian!Bruce?
Damian: What do you mean he doesnāt know heās Batman?
Bruce: You are my son? That I was unaware of until you were ten? And your mother and I donāt speak to one another?
Damian: *entirely speechless because how does one explain the al Ghuls?*
Bruce: Youā¦your first language was Arabic? I apparently speak Arabic, why do you not call me father in your native tongue?
Damian: *still speechless because his father has no knowledge of him and yet itās very clear that he is still loved beyond Batman and Robin and heās not sure how to take this at the moment*
Bruce being upset with past him because he went out with all the women- publically-Ā while Clark was at home and entirely aware and heās kicking himself and promising to be a better partner, a better father and a better CEO.
Everyone else: *tearing their hair out because Bruce is breaking his own cover*
bruce wayne doing tv spot psas, like, hi, iām bruce wayne, as some of you may not know, i have amnesia. but i love gotham. and that is why i am building a new community center. and like he is undoing like 30 yrs of meticulous brucie ground work yet also the public loves him??? and so when he is like, i am in love with reporter clark kent, everyone is like omg amnesia bruce still remembered his lover. and like they are the new it coupleĀ
And the joker knows his batsy and ThAts NOT HIS BATSY!! So the joker is out to prove thatās an imposter and the Robins are freaking out.
conversely,Ā the joker is really bad at proving thats not batsyĀ
SO ITS MORE FUNNY THAN ANYTHING
and yes, the joker is 100% a coms guyĀ
None of you are bringing up how confused amnesiac-Bruce would be about his instincts and muscle memory?
You donāt get to be jacked without training, so writing it off as ālifting weights and doing martial arts,ā especially since thereās almost certainly a very well-equipped gym at Wayne Manor, is an easy way to spackle over that.
No, what I want to see is how he reacts to all the tabloid photos of him looking beat-to-shit at some gala.
āClark? Beforeā¦. did we have a lot of, you know, rough play?ā
